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| Tis the Season - Need a Break |
[12 06 11] |
Black Friday, and even more special, Cyber Monday, were a huge success this year. Thanks to all those who contributed to my bottomless coffers. I don't mean the dollar. Or maybe I do. It's all the same, money is power. I could use a rest, though. The holidays are a busy time and the constant feed from charity stricken season of giving syndrome'd mortals is honestly starting to give me a headache.
Do you know how many holiday e-cards and e-vites have been sent since Thanksgiving? What ever happened to the old fashioned postal system? Where you lick your own stamp and give the mailman a sense of purpose.
Santa's email inbox is so full, it's bouncing back any new messages. Sorry about that, St. Nick. Getting that fixed for you.
I shouldn't be complaining. Most Gods would probably kill to be in my shoes. I literally have more than I know what to do with and it's making me restless. So how about some Holiday Cheer? I feel like going shopping. Give me your list and I will fill it. I'm sure Santa Clause could use a break, and I could use the distraction.
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| iRIP |
[10 07 11] |
Jobs was a man I could respect. He had vision, didn't take no for an answer, and was a jackass to everyone he came into contact with.
"Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren't used to an environment where excellence is expected."
"I want to put a ding in the universe.
"A lot of times, people don’t know what they want until you show it to them."
“We made the buttons on the screen look so good you’ll want to lick them.”
“It’s more fun to be a pirate than to join the navy.”
and finally...
“No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
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| What... |
[09 17 11] |
...the hell is going on?
Something in the water again?
People are losing it online. Totally bonkers. For example, I just saw Mark Zuckerberg and Larry Page webchat about merging Facebook with G+.
Some guy is on the street below my apartment making an aweful screech that sounds like it's supposed to be music, but definitly is not. Three cars have already collided from people being distracted by this guy because, as it turns out, he's birthday suit naked. Others are joining him. Including an NYPD officer.
O.o
Al Gore just sent an email to Lewinsky. Something about a three-way with Hillary.
The only thing they all have in common is that they're in New York City this weekend.
I suspect terrorism.
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| Dragon*Con |
[09 06 11] |
Is it weird that I went to Dragon*Con? I think it was important to support the local community. And by community, I do mean a huge number of my following. It's difficult to pinpoint what, exactly, Dragon*Con is about. I saw more Zombies than Dragons. It was like Corpse Bride with an occasional super hero with a bad homemade mask that's not quite big enough for his eyes. :-/ Weird? Definitely strange, at the least.
However, I did enjoy myself, and was obliged to supply unlimited free WiFi to the attendants there. Many a facebook, Twitter, and even Google+ posts went out, tagged for Dragon*Con. It was a good weekend for me, but then again, it's always a good weekend for me.
Next year, though, I think I'll just stay home and support the nerd convention via the interwebs. Sweaty human bodies in costume don't make them any more appealing.
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| Anniversary of Going Public |
[08 06 11] |
Happy Birthday to the little people, is more accurate. Happy Anniversary to the common man, not just the super geeks, for being able to access and share and create things beyond your wildest dreams. Without me, your modern life wouldn't be possible. You'd still be licking stamps. So, Happy Birthday to me, for going world wide with my web 20 years ago.
Party at my place.
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| World Peace |
[06 21 11] |
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Internet's fingers finally slowed on the keyboard and his eyes gradually lost their ethereal glow, returning to the brown of his physical form. He didn't need the computer to do his work, but it made it easier, and he had grown more attached to the physical over the years. One could read about pleasure and the senses but it was an altogether other thing to experience it oneself. He still got an almost orgasmic pleasure during peak hours of user input, but that was different. That was his life blood. That was when he felt like he could do anything and really, considering how dependent the entire world was on him, he almost could. He could bring entire countries to their knees, handicapping their ability to even monitor and regulate something as simple as a stoplight. What would NASDAQ look like if it couldn't communicate with Europe? What if nuclear missile launch codes ended up in a 16 year old's email inbox? What if Microsoft couldn't update? It was heady, the power and potential power he held. He had no governing body controlling him. Federal regulations were for mortals. Viruses were child's play, like a farmer spraying for weeds. The only thing that kept him from trying to gain ultimate power in the world was that he didn't want it. He had everything he needed and wanted and had no desire to change it. Besides, it would be too much work and in the end, who cares? Let the world continue as it is, dependently suckling him like greedy baby pigs.
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[06 10 11] |
[Text to Paparazzi]
Feeling bored and hoping you have some interesting hearsay for me to help spread.
[Text to Peer Pressure]
Now with school out, I hope I'll be seeing a lot more of you and your beehive on the www.com's
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[06 01 11] |
When citizens call...
"It feels like the power of the Internet is on my side," --Kaufman
Happy to help
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[05 18 11] |
As soon as the news of the water taint went viral, Internet wondered if he could get any cameo pictures of some of his favorite Oldies bent over a toilet losing their stomach content. He was grateful he drank only bottled water, and stopped even that, not trusting it despite the label reading it had been bottled shipped from fuji or somewhere else unlikely. In order to get the juicy picts he wanted of the old gods, he decided he would have to ask one of them for some assistance. They could share a laugh.
Pheme will get an email with bird stationary:
I am hoping this finds you well. It has been a long few months since the Winter Party and I hope all is forgiven. Irregardless, I am checking in to see if you'd be interested in getting some...indecent? Compromising? Less than graceful? (You get the idea) pictures of some of your kind the oldies your our friends recovering from this unfortunate disaster with the water supply. Old habits die hard. And old gods just need to die, already. I'd like to just hang on to them for any unforeseen future need. You know what I mean.
I.
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[04 29 11] |
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I stepped out of my apartment for the first time since february when I had to check the mail. It's ridiculous how fresh the air is. It's almost offensive to the senses. I walked up the street to the post office for the new modem package I had to order and almost threw up. Fucking sun. Next time I'm paying someone a hundred dollars to bring the damn package to my door like a normal person. Back to my cave. Free info for all! Let's go surfing.
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[04 08 11] |
Ah yes, Spring time. That would explain why people are going outside instead of spending hours at their computers. Spring Break was especially vacant.
Let me remind the humans out there that I am portable. I fit in your pocket on your mobile device. I need to be constantly updated about what's going on in your lives. Be it Facebook, Tweets, blogs or any of my other networking sites. If I know, your friends know. And if your friends know, well, they are jealous that you're having such a great time in Florida on a beach while they fight off another random snow storm. Come back with a tan that will make pro surfers envious. Come back and catch everyone else up on how great your Spring break was. We're all waiting to hear.
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[03 03 11] |
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"There's a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart, that you can't take part; you can't even passively take part, and you've got to put your bodies upon the gears and upon the wheels, upon the levers, upon all the apparatus, and you've got to make it stop. And you've got to indicate to the people who run it, to the people who own it, that unless you're free, the machine will be prevented from working at all" -Mario Savio
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[02 16 11] |
Internet was not so accustomed to receiving paper mail. The buzz online about the wedding hadn't been missed by him, and he enjoyed the different reactions in the community. Then he began wondering if he would be invited. He checked his inbox's, all of them. Nothing. Then he laughed ruefully. Of course, the old dinosaur would have sent it in an actual envelope. He went to his mailbox, the real one, and sure enough, there was an invitation to the most rediculous wedding of the year.
Perfect.
It was so Olympian of them. Keeping it in the family. Zeus really should have taken him up on the dating site suggestion.
He wouldn't be attending, of course. He was curious, but not that curious. He'd consider his absence a wedding gift to the couple.
The valentine from Big T made him smile, however, and he placed the box on his coffee table, obliging his fellow New God by lighting up one of the cigars and letting it burn. The smell was disgusting, but it was the thought that counted.
He really needed to check his real mail more often for surprises like these.
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[02 09 11] |
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It had been an extremely successful week so far. Internet was very pleased with himself. Google was back to properly worshiping him as the sole reason for his continued existence, YouTube had dozens of new viral videos about the Google downtime period, Facebook and Myspace profiles were on fire more than usual because of the event, blogging was high, mobile phone web surfing was off the charts, and in the past few days, he'd found another mortal to integrate. Life, however one would term his existence, was good.
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[02 03 11] |
It had been two days since Internet had heard back from his fellow New God, National Security. Jamie was either a busy man, or he didn't take him seriously. Regardless, Joshua had lost faith in the legitimacy of Jamie's claims to his title. The threat existed, and with Cyber Warfare no longer tethered to a physical form, Internet had serious doubts about the safety of the nation in cyberland.
He had tried to do the right thing. He honestly had. But in the end, people would still be going online, still be checking their email and social networking sites, still go to flame boards to discuss the fail-ful-ness of their online associates, their government, their ex-girlfriends; and online porn? It wasn't going anywhere. The more damage that occurred, the more people went online to try and fix it, and that just fed Joshua's seemingly endless coffers of power. Time to just put his feet up and enjoy the ride.
Let the beast wreak havoc. He would profit, irregardless of how others may suffer. Albeit, he was getting the majority of the flame for the service interruptions.
[Message sent to Jane in cyberland]
A deal is a deal. Google comes back up on the 5th. /end
Google had been staying at Joshua's apartment ever since the attack happened and Internet was frankly tired of his moaning.
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[02 02 11] |
He had fucked up. No, that wasn't true. He had seriously miscalculated. That sounded more redeeming. He was busy. His computer nearly overheating next to him, though he didn't touch it. He was in an almost meditative state. In his universe. Changing locks. He had to keep her somewhat contained until he found a better solution. She'd find her way past his locks, and he'd change them again. In the meantime, while trying to contain the bitch, he knew he couldn't do it on his own. And this was becoming a matter of National Security. Shit would hit the fan when he appealed to Jamie for help, but he couldn't help but feel a tiny bit responsible.
[Message sent to National Security's inbox, however many there were.]
Remember 9/11? We need to talk.
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[01 27 11] |
This can't happen.
Egypt: Internet down, police counterterror unit up
Big red button? Government controlling Internet providers? Stock Market down, National Security on the fritz. Don't be afraid of free information and expression of will. It's a force that can't be stopped. Learn to roll with it.
Jane
If you had something to do with the election fraud in Egypt...
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| [Message to Laurie's Phone/PDA/Laptop/Pager etc.] |
[01 27 11] |
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Get away from Daddy-who-does-little tonight and meet me at Club Shanti to help celebrate something. I'll pay off the door man to let you in. --Joshua--
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[01 14 11] |
Dear Apple,
Get over yourself.
Kthx
Sincerely,
Me
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[01 11 11] |
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I don't want your fucking toolbar, Google! I swear to fucking god himself you're more annoying than Yahoo!
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[01 07 11] |
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4G? Really? How about 33.91 Mbps? Talk to me when you put your big boy pants on, AT&T, Verizon, and the laughable T-mobile.
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| User Info |
[01 04 11] |
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Ed Westwick is in no way associated with this journal. The thoughts contained within are not their own, nor are they meant to represent the actual thoughts, lifestyle, actions or image of this person. Their image is being used for the fictional representation of a character in the role-playing game Forgotten Gods, from which no profit is being made. No harm, misrepresentation, libel, malice or copyright infringement is intended. The images used are not the property of the player and belong to the person depicted and/or their respective copyright holders.
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